So yesterday was pretty bad.

The puppy's been sick so I've been cleaning up dog shit for the past 2 days. Sam randomly decided to puke in my room, and today the cats shit in the hallway. It's like their all against me or something. I'm fighting the war on dog shit. That sounds fucking fantastic. My mom didn't get home till late, just to tell me my schooling is going to cost a shit load of money that we dont have so if i DO indeed get to go, It's not going to be until January. This seriously blows. Not just because i now have to get a full time job, but I have been so anxious and excited for this, and now January just seems so far away...

I've been taking the pills my shrink gave me. Every time i see them i think to myself "Does this define me?" Does it? Can one little white pill save me? I don't think so. I could survive without them, so why am i on this medication? Is it because every shrink is so readable that the second you say something about wanting to commit suicide, they give you medication just to cover their asses in case i ever really did it? I don't know. It just seems like everytime i take one of those pills i have a rush of these thoughts coming to me. I think i'm more fucking depressed after taking the pills than i was before. Anyway, I'm out.